How to Ruin My Movie Experience

With the summer movie season about explode upon us, here's a few tips on how you can absolutely ruin my movie going experience.

I love movies. I love going to the theatre. The whole big screen, popcorn munching, Dolby-THX whatever sound surrounding me. But there are a few things that you can do to ruin my cinematic pleasure.

1. You go to the movie theater and complain to the Box Office Cashier as if the prices had outrageously changed by massive amounts of money since you were last there. Face it , it ain't 1964 when I saw Mary Poppins at the old Yakima Theatre when I was nine and got into a matinee for fifty cents. The prices are what they are. Nobody is forcing you to go. I don't wanna hear you complain in line in front of me.

2.  Sit in front of me and proceed to dump $45 worth of popcorn, candy and soda on the floor. What the heck, some minimum wage kid gets paid to clean it up , right? It's their job, right? C'mon people, have some couth!

3.  Sit anywhere near me and talk or text on your cell phone. I don't get this. What is so darn important that you can't wait the 97 minute running time to connect with you little buds? just plain rude!

4.  Don't us a theatre as a daycare/babysitter. Supervise your kids. Keep 'em quiet. I'm into the previews, I don't care that the "real" movie hasn't started yet.  Shut those kids up!

5.  If you're a really tall person, and the theatre is mostly empty, don't sit in front of me. No, really, go sit somewhere else. I don't mind.

6... Finally if you've already seen the movie, don't give up the plot to the flick or sing lyrics to all of the songs.

I went to a re release of Disney's The Little Mermaid a few years back, because I'd only seen it on video and wanted see it on a big screen. A young man in front of me proceeded to sing all of the songs in the movie to his imaginary child. This did not sound very good because: A- We all knew the words, but refrained from singing along, and B- he couldn't sing worth a darn.

Just follow a few of these suggestions, and if we are in the same theatre, we'll get along.

Thanks a bunch.