My Daughter Wants Our Black Cat Fluffy to Be the Mayor
I told my mom today that her granddaughter, 10-year-old Willow, wants our cat, Fluffy, to become the mayor of Yakima. I haven't heard my mom laugh like that in years. She told me she knew cuckoo runs in the family but she didn't expect it to come from us. She kept laughing at how she would keep it a secret from all of her friends and even family members lest they start making fun of HER for having kids and grandkids who are trying to elect a cat to City Council.
"Plus, he is a BLACK CAT. Do you know how much he would experience--?"
"Racism!" I said with a shout.
"No! How much hatred he would get for being a black cat because a lot of people think black cats are BAD LUCK. And y'all want a black cat to be your mayor? Hahahaha! I'm calling y'all 'Keepin' Up with The Crazies' from now on!" Then she laughed and told me she had to get off the phone. She was STILL laughing at us! She is probably still having quite a few chuckles at our expense as she lays her head down to sleep! How rude, Mom! 😂💟
Parents these days, amirite!
So how did we get to this point of my child becoming dead serious about our cat, Fluffy, running for mayor of Yakima? It all started about a month ago...
One day out of the blue, Willow came bouncing her little hyper self into my bedroom and said, "Mom, what does Fluffy need to do to become the Mayor of Yakima?"
I looked at her like she just had an eye fall out.
"You want Fluffy to do WHAT?!" I asked, astonished.
"I want Fluffy to be the Mayor. And with the money he makes, we can save up and buy a house!" Willow exclaimed, with money signs dangling in her pupils like one of those money-faced emojis.
I told Willow that first of all, Fluffy needs to get a campaign manager and pay the filing fee.
"Filing Week is coming up soon, so you better jump on the ball. He needs a campaign strategy and a platform. What are Fluffy's three main campaign issues?" I informed Willow, not thinking that she would take me seriously.
"Fluffy wants to feed the homeless, end racism, and stop all the dogs from chasing cats," said Willow.
Well, okay then. At least there is something we can work with. Sounds like Fluffy has his eyes on the prize, and that prize is becoming the mayor.
I thought that would be the end of our discussion and that Willow would soon forget about her sneaky plans to take over City Council (yes, I see right through her, using "Fluffy" as her way into politics). Wow, was I ever wrong? Willow has been hounding me every single day about making Fluffy some campaign fliers and asking me about what sort of perks Fluffy can expect once he becomes the mayor.
Today, I'd had just about enough of her asking me how much money Fluffy would make as the mayor and if she would have to sit in on all the City Council meetings and talk for him when it is his turn to say something. Then she brought ME into it, asking if I would sit next to her during city council meetings when Fluffy has to go to them.
I finally broke it down to her that Fluffy was not old enough or human enough to actually become the mayor of Yakima, and that we don't elect a mayor in this town. (The Yakima City Council members choose amongst themselves who will reside as mayor and assistant mayor.)
That's when Willow told me that there are other cats who have been elected mayor and that one was a kitten when it was thrust into "city politics." She even told me to Google it, so I did. Turns out a cat named Stubbs was the resident mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska for some 20 human years. That's 140 years in cat years.
So that is why we are asking that somebody, anybody, please vote for Fluffy for Mayor. Just so that Willow will get off my back. Hahahaha! Thank you!